Missing My Mom
I know that Death is a part of Life, and everyone will die eventually…. just because it is a fact of life, doesn’t mean it’s any less painful to think about the whole ordeal that is Death.
It has been 6 months to the day since my Mom died. This’ll be my first Christmas without her. Sure there were plenty of times in the past where we weren’t together at Christmas. Like when she was living in Florida, and I was here in Kentucky. But at least back then we could write letters, and call each other. Now who am I gonna call…..? <—- And NO I didn’t intentionally write that as a Ghostbusters joke!
May 16, 2015 I wrote the following POST, explaining what had been going on with my Mom health wise, and the after effects of her death two days afterwards. You can see that POST HERE.
Since that time I’ve been extremely blessed with multiple family members coming to my aid. As well as all the friends, fans, and whomever came across my donations page on FUNDLY.
My Uncle Richard and Aunt Cheryl helped me get the current apartment I’m living in, and I’m finally living by myself again. Two other family members have sent me money which went towards getting through life the last six months, stuff like paying rent, getting groceries etc etc. The money that has been raised through the Fundly donation page and stuff people have sent to my paypal has all gone towards bills and getting myself caught up.
THANK YOU TO EVERYONE!!!!! I means more than you know.
Because I’ve labeled this post “Missing My Mom”…. I wanted to share a few stories and memories of her. Because this is the Christmas season….. I’ve somewhat become an emotional wreck, and haven’t been handling it well when seeing all the Christmassy type stuff that everyone is doing, that my Mom and I used to do. There were many traditions Mom and I had….. here are a few:
Watching Christmas Specials and Films…. stuff like:
-A Charlie Brown Christmas
-How the Grinch Stole Christmas (the animated one, THIS WAS MY MOM’S FAV ANIMATED SPECIAL)
-Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer
-Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer
-Frosty the Snowman
-The Santa Clause films
-Home Alone 1-2
-Mickey’s Christmas Carol
-Muppets Christmas Carol (THIS WAS MOM’S FAV!!!)
AND OF COURSE THE BEST CHRISTMAS MOVIE OF ALL TIME…..
-National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation
You might be reading this and asking….. “But TFG1Mike… what about A Christmas Story???” I enjoy that film, but TBS and TNT have killed it for me with the constant “tradition” of 24 hours of A Christmas Story. I watch the film once a year at Christmas that’s it. Since my Mom and I found out about Jeff Dunham his Christmas Special was also among the ones we watched.
Somehow with my Mom no longer here…. I’ve avoided watching most of these Christmas media pieces. Because all I’ll end up doing is crying through half of them. The funny thing is when someone who is very special to you gives you a NCIS style “Gibbs slap” to the back of the head, and does a livestream of Charlie Brown and Christmas Vacation…. you can’t help but feel the joy of the season. My girlfriend Jennifer…. she did this recently, and it kicked out my bah humbug state of mind. At least while we were watching the films.
The following stories are the way I BELIEVE I remember them happening, it might not be how they actually happened.
So Story #1 of my Mom:
Christmas 1986 – 1992…..the funny thing is I don’t remember anything I ever got for Christmas anymore…. except for three different times. The first time was Christmas 1986…. when I had gotten NEW hats for my Boston Red Sox and the New York Mets. Now I am forever a die-hard Red Sox fan, and hate most everything about New York. But the Mets in the 80s had some awesome players that I liked. Plus I was only 6 years old at the time, I was still coming to terms of being a Red Sox or die fan.
Then in either 87 or 88 we were at a Child World, and my Mom said I could pick a video game system. Before this time all we had was an Atari 2600. I remember the wars between Child World and Toys ‘R’ Us…. they were immense and intense! Obviously TRU won…. OK so my Mom allowed me a choice…. a Nintendo Entertainment System…. or a Sega Master System. See my Mom, and I assume all parents do this…. took me to the store a few weeks before Christmas and had me pick out what I might want Santa to bring me the most that year. I believe this was 1988 because we had just seen Naked Gun 1 in theaters. That film released December 2, 1988, and I believe, although I can’t remember that we had gone to the theater to see it. So I’m standing there in the store looking at each of the systems. My cousins Rachael, Robbie, and Cassie had a NES. Well mostly it was Rachael’s since Robbie was only just over two years old, and Cass was about a year old or so. Either way the Malone household had the Nintendo Entertainment System. I remember countless hours being at Castle Malone and playing Super Mario Bros with Rach. I was over their house all the time, so silly little me inside the Child World store chose the Sega Master System, because I wanted something different. I got several games along with this system. The few that I remember having as long as I had the Master System (1988-1992) were Alex Kidd Lost Stars, I loved this game for some odd reason,. Reggie Jackson Baseball, Grand Prix, and I wanna say I had the first Golden Axe, but I’m not sure on that. Really when it came out and I had it that first Christmas…. I was all about playing Alex Kidd and Reggie Jackson Baseball…. don’t ask me why.
Then Christmas of 1992…. it had been a full year and more since Nintendo had released the Super Nintendo Entertainment System. I wanted it soooooo badly. I made sure I was EXTRA good that year. Even though there were are few times where I had been bad… overall it was a pretty good year as far as my behavior. All throughout 1991 after the SNES had been released… every time we’d go to the Kingston Independence Mall…. I’d beg my Mom to let me go to the Nintendo Center. It was this giant kiosk in the middle of the mall that was set up to allow you to test out the SNES and other systems. I remember every time I went I played Super Mario World’s Donut Plains 1 over and over again. After this had happen… I knew what my big present from Santa was gonna be in 1992. When Christmas rolled around that year….. I remember my Mom actually pull a “Christmas Story” moment on me…. by hiding the SNES until it was the very last present. My Mom always went all out with my biggest present of the year. With the SNES I got Super Mario World, Mario Paint, and the SNES Mouse, Wings II: Aces High, and a bunch of other games that I can’t remember. The funny thing is she never got me A Link to the Past. I remember going over to my friend Andy’s house in order to play that.
I was always a kid who wanted to stay up past their bedtime, and let’s face it that is MOST kids right? Well because we were still on Christmas Vacation…. I remember my Mom wanted me to clean my room New Years Eve…. I obviously didn’t want to… I wanted to continue playing SMW all day and all night long. Hell there were nights during that Christmas season after I got the SNES that I’d sneak out into the living room, turn the TV nobs all the way down so she couldn’t hear the volume, and play the games all night long. Those were some GREAT TIMES!
So Story #2 of my Mom:
This story is of more recent Christmases. In 2006 I had brought my Mom here to Kentucky for the first time. She lived here for about 4 years then went back up to Massachusetts. So we had 4 Christmases together. At the time we were both working as live in residents for Father Maloney’s Boys’ and Girls’ Haven. So we each had our own apartments, in separate apartment sites. I pretty much spent those Christmases away from my apartment and spent the time with my Mom. Because we had all her Christmas stuff set up in her apartment. I believe also during this time we had been renting a house, separate from when we were in the apartments…. We had Christmas there as well. In 2006 Mom got our Dog Snowwhite. She was with my Mom everywhere she went. Snow was one of those types of dogs that she’d love you no matter what. Snow was with us until Mom’s passing this year. I then gave her to the therapist at Boys Haven. Snow is now a full time therapy dog for kids who were like me in states custody. I hear she is having a blast at the Klondike Lane apartment building. So these four Christmases were all awesome… No matter where my Mom was living we always celebrated. We had so much to laugh about. Having Snowwhite made Christmases even more hilarious.
The crazy thing is after my Mom went back to Massachusetts in May or June of 2010…. I do not remember that year’s Christmas, nor do I remember 2011’s Christmas. December 4, 2012… I had to once again go up to Massachusetts to bring my Mom back down to Kentucky. I’ve lived in Simpsonville, Shelbyville, and Louisville KY since 1993. Louisville is the city I most know like the back of my hand, and I can get around all of the areas very well on my own through the busses. Christmas 2012 was at my Apartment because Mom hadn’t yet signed the new lease on hers. So we were living together in the same place… for the first time in 20 Years or so…. the last time we lived together was when she was in Florida. This was around 1996-1997 when I was there with her. So we were living together until she could get set up here again. Christmas of 2012 was a fun one, but again one I barely remember. honestly after Mom started getting really sick….. there aren’t many good times I remember from the last 3 years.
The point is though that from 2006-2010 those were four of the BEST Christmases I ever had. Along with the Christmases from 1986-1992! Christmas 2015 is turning out to be a “the shitter was full” kinda Christmas. I mean don’t get me wrong… I’m 35 nearly 36 years old…. I shouldn’t have the want of Christmas presents, but I still kinda do… who doesn’t right? I even got my mom a card… even though she isn’t here anymore. I dunno… I was buying Christmas Cards for Jen, and I saw one that I knew my Mom would die laughing over. So I just grabbed it.
So to end this… I will always remember the good times with my Mom, and those Christmases that kicked ass! If anyone wants to help me have a great Christmas this year the best thing you can do is donate to the Fundly page I have set up, or you can paypal me… send to firstname.lastname@example.org. Thank you to all the awesome friends, fans, and all you other people online who have been with me in my 7 Year journey through podcasting. I’m sure I’ll make it to 10 years of podcasting!!! … or more……
I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!